February 11, 2019 Seek His Light; He Knows Better

"The light shineth in darkness, and the darkness comprehendeth it not..." Boy do I have a lot to learn.

Sencillo:

     I have an AlphaSmart. It's a portable keyboard that stores what I type, so I can get more done in my hour for emailing at the computer. I asked my mission president, and he said it's best if I only use it on my P-Day, so I still don't have a bunch of extra time, but today we went to the lake before emailing, so I had time to write a longer email on this AlphaSmart, but I can't make any promises for next week. Whatever happens, I still love you, Mom. 

     Here's a summary of all the notes I made in my agenda throughout the week:

     They give really cool haircuts here and they're only $2. Also, on the buses people pass through all the time to sell stuff and sometimes just start rapping. One of the senior couples just left on Saturday, so when we met with the Mission President for our transferly interviews, we all wrote thank you notes so they can make a thank you book for them. We also got copies to take home of the Liahona (a church magazine with lots of talks and stories) and I love it. It's like paradise every bedtime. One other thing is on about half of the buses I can press my head against the ceiling when I stand up straight, so I don't need to hang on to anything for support. On Wednesday I had my first time stepping in dog poop and my first time not falling asleep at some point during our weekly district meeting: win-win. On Thursday I received a strong impression that I need to keep playing the violin after my mission, and we did morning service by helping a less active member chop down a tree and carry all of its severed parts about a quarter mile to chuck it in a giant ditch. We made multiple trips, but Elder Hales, the other gringo, and I carried the biggest part (about 15 feet long) together. It was pretty heavy, and everyone in the street was calling out to us and whistling. I guess there's something funny about 2 gringos sprinting through the street with a giant tree. We woke up on Friday to the beautiful sound of gunshot. We had another training session with our president and all the new missionaries, and that was cool. Afterward, we ate lunch at their house. Later in the day we passed a less active member young man in the street and we said hi, then I asked him if he could go to church on Sunday. He hesitated a little then said, "Uh I'm not sure." So I said "Oh that's too bad, why not?" He sat and thought for about 5 seconds, then said, "Yep, I'm going." I also saw a pretty good quote that day on someone's shirt. It says, "People who think they know everything annoy those of us who do." On Saturday we had the opportunity to go to a conference, with all the missions in El Salvador, next to the El Salvador Temple, with D. Todd Christopherson (one of the 12 living apostles) and 2 area seventies, Elder Uceda and Elder Goddoy. On the way there, our bus driver pulled a U-turn (6 point turn) in the middle of the freeway. These people don't mess around. The conference was really cool.>We got to shake everyone's hands. Only bad thing was everyone and their wives actually secretly already speak Spanish. Just kidding, it was cool, but I wouldn't have been opposed to hearing an apostle in English. It's been a while. I started keeping a journal for all the Personal Revelation, Insight, or Applicable Knowledge I receive while studying or learning. But it's always personal to me and things that invite specific action. That helps a lot. After the conference, I saw Hunter Sincock and an Elder (Abner) Gonnzalez, who is from Guatemala, and apparently knows my brother, Ammon. On Sunday I was a little tired during church, and one of the Hermanos offerend me a candy to help keep me awake. The candy here has a tendency to look really good but taste the complete opposite. After church we left to go visit people with the bishop (super cool man) in his car, and I almost used my seatbelt, before remembering this was El Salvador. That was a close one. Saturday, Sunday, and today have been my best days in the mission, and I was surprised why. 

      I forgot to mention that we're going to visit a lake today in an area called Congo, and D. Todd cristopherson is in two of my pictures. See if you can find him.

Gracioso:

     My companion and I usually find people who already attend a different church. When asking to find out which one it is, Elder Velasquez usually asks them to describe it. He asks, "Is it great (in size)?" They proudly say yes. Then he asks, "Is it spacious?" And they confidently say yes. He always gets a kick out of that. 

Importante:

     3 things (or more):

     This week has been super good, in terms of making the best of my time, despite the obstacles. One hard thing for me is the shower water is always freezing cold, and it's always hard to start a shower in the morning, but I've learned that waiting won't make a difference in how it feels, but it makes a difference in how long it takes me to get ready. The showers will always be cold. The air will always be hot. My shoes will always get dirty. I will always be tired in some way. So? So I take a shower, I walk in the sun, I polish my shoes, I wake up and get to work, because some things never change, but I do. The work will always be the same. No amount of work or growth or preparation will make the showers any warmer. So waiting won't do me any good.

    Luis was baptized when he was 8, but never went to church for 10 years after that. He lives with his 19 year old sister and younger siblings in a shack. Their mom lives in San Salvador and only sends them money. (We visited them and celebrated a birthday and had dinner). During a lesson with him and his sister, Alba, she asked what to do if someone doesn't believe in God, talking about Luis. Here in El Salvador, that's super rare. Luis told us he just had no reason to believe, and there was no way to know. We shared with him some scriptures about that, explaining it, but the word of the day was 'experiment'. We told him he can't take our word for anything, but rather try it for himself. We told him the story of Jesus, who fed multitudes with 5 loaves and 2 fishes. He only had to give his 5 loaves and 2 fishes, and the Lord could multiply, but there's only one way to find out, cause 0 times 0 is still 0. He said he would come to church. We had about 6 people we were teaching, all believers in God, all believers in his gospel to a certain level, committed to come to church this Sunday, and none of them came, but Luis did. He had practically no faith, but he has a great desire, and if he continues to search and experiment with real intent, he will find himself living the promise of Alma 32:37, and once he gains that faith, he will receive it with such a strong grip that he will never lose it again, so long as he continues to grow every day. I can relate a lot to Luis, so I know we can't judge him by what he has or is right now, but by the potential he has to become. Why? Because faith without works is dead. And works doesn't just mean routines, patterns, not breaking the rules. I'll let you determine what it really means to show your faith by your works, but I can almost guarantee we, individually, aren't operating at our full potential, I know I'm not.  

     As we seek to become more like Christ, we will understand more the blessings we're promised, although becoming, in itself, is the greatest of them. But you have to try walking the walk before you can see with his eyes. The same idea of experimenting. When the men carrying the Ark came to the river which they were promised would separate for their passage, nothing changed until they stepped in the water. When the disciples asked Jesus where he lived, he said, "Come and See".

     I had a really powerful, sort of frightening spiritual experience on Saturday, during my personal study. I promised I wouldn't share the specific details, but I'll just say 2 things. First, the Light of Christ is much more than just a happy, cute expression. Seek the Light of Christ. Seek to understand what it is. I still am learning, but I know it has power beyond words. Without it, the scriptures are really just a bunch of words to me. I can't really explain it, but I know for weeks I had been praying for help with a question I thought didn't have an answer. And for weeks I didn't think to seek the scriptures. On Saturday I did, and I read the words, but my answer didn't come in words. I felt dumb for waiting so long to actually search. My 5 loaves, 2 fishes. It was as if a giant feast had been prepared for me, and I went to the cook and told him to feed me. These scriptures were prepared for us. Drink deep, or taste not of the Pesperian Spring. When we read, are seeking to cross of a check box, or trying to learn to grow. There's a story Ronald Reagan told about a man, a Christian man, who, when walking along a cliff, slipped, barely cathing himself, hanging above a 100 foot fall. He cried out, saying "God, if you can hear me, please help me!" And out of the Heavens, he heard a voice saying, "If you have faith, jump." The man paused, then looked back up at the sky and asked, "Is anyone else up there?" That was presented as a joke, but it's got a point. Now, I'm not saying we should go around jumping off cliffs, but when we pray - when we search the scriptures - are we looking for answers, or are we looking for the answers we want to hear? He knows better. Take his advice if you're gonna ask for it. In the MTC, they told us "If you want to talk to God, pray. If you want him to talk to you, read the scriptures." There is so much to learn and put into practice, but sometimes we're happy just existing in the church rather than living in it. He knows better. I've been happier these last 3 days than I've been in the in the last couple years, if not more. That's a result of praying, reading, and working, with the question, "What lack I yet?", not "Is anyone else up there?"

     I know I talk a lot, probably too much. Sorry if I sound prideful in anyway here. That's not my intent; I'm just learning a lot, and having a hard time deciding how much I should share, and I'm kind of just thinking out loud more than anything. Putting off the natural man is tough, but edifying, rewarding, and empowering. It's like fasting only to find out that I never really needed food. This is where I find more joy than I have ever experienced before, as the First Presidency promised in Preach My Gospel. This isn't how I expected to find it or what I though it would look like, but thank goodness for that. He knows better.

"The light shineth in darkness, and the darkness comprendeth it not..."

I Love you,

Elder Olson